Hey Dr. Matt, how ARE you? Tell me, in your medical opinion, am I ever going to deliver this child out of me?

-Really Pregnant
Well, R.P. first I should note that I don’t have a “doctorate” in the strictest sense; that is, in the sense that I “graduated” from a “university.” My doctorate is what I call the doctorate of life, which is much different than a medical doctor, especially those who poke around in birth canals.
The birth canals I poke around in are the birth canals of …

Dr. Matt,
I noticed on a website of yours that you are a Barack Obama Supporter. This puzzles me. I know You, being of superior intellect, would look at everything and consider all angles before getting behind some one with your support.

Example, If I wrote and asked you a question and only gave you a very vague description, how easy would it be for you to asses my situation? If I gave you little information, and little, of the information given qualified my position how would you then back my position? …

Dear Dr. Matt,
I’m married, and a girlfriend of mine asked me one day what I did when my husband gets attracted to other women. I told her that it was impossible, that we’re happily married, and people who are happily married don’t get attracted to other people. The thing is, when I said this, she looked at me like I was crazy. I love my husband and I know he loves me. But she always has good things to say, so I’m wondering, Dr. Matt, am …

Dear Dr. Matt:What does my love for koalas and skunks say about my personality?-Odd Animal Lover
Well OAL, a lot of so-called “doctors” with “doctoral degrees” might start by talking about the archetypes of the koala and the skunk, and how the traits we attribute to these creatures might mirror aspects of your personality that you like about yourself. That is, the koala has a certain fuzziness, a very likable quality. Skunks are actually also very friendly animals, but as we all know, you do not cross a skunk. …

One of those funny guys on the Spoodcast podcast (www.spoodcast.com) asked me this question:
Dr. Matt, at what age should children be allowed to have a Myspace page?
A lot of parents ask these questions as if there might be magical ages when kids should do X, Y, or Z. But let’s get to the magical ages later. First, let’s talk about what I know about Myspace.
My understanding is that the Internets are a series of tubes or pipes, not unlike a water utility. Myspace is like a type of water processing …

Dear Dr. Matt,
Recently my son came home from school quite upset. He said “Mom, guess what my teacher did today?!”
Hearing other stories about this particular teacher, I knew I couldn’t guess and said, “Tell me.”
The story went something like this: “Well, this other kid in my class really likes saying ‘noob sauce,’ and so he was saying ‘noob sauce’ all day and for like the last week. The teacher was mad and told him that he had to stop saying ‘noob sauce’ because it wasn’t a word and it meant …

Recently, I received this message:
Dear Dr. Matt,
I have a serious problem. I can’t seem to get this ridiculously cheesy grin off my face. By the way, I think your moustache is really hot and it makes me smile.
Sincerely, Grinny McGrinnerson.
Now, while this message may have been made in jest (I’m really not sure because I would take it at face value that my moustache is hot), I can certainly relate to the feeling the writer is talking about. You know folks, sometimes we’re having a mediocre or not-so-great time, and …

A visitor to my Myspace page left this comment:
“Dear Dr. Matt,
I need a cure for heartache. What do you recommend?
BTW, the mustache is Sexy.”
Dear Girl Who Likes My Moustache (GWLMM – I’ll just call you Gollum to make it easier.),
I think you stumbled upon something that I detail in my book, that, often times, you already have the answer you’re looking for.
You see, you ask me about the cure for heartache, and then you made the offhand comment about my moustache. This is what I call a “dangler,” that is, …