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Folks, it’s time for a change.
I don’t mean for me.  I’m happy as a clam who has been invited to a clam honoring ceremony, in which he or she is about to receive an award for Most Delightful Clam.  I can’t think of other circumstances in which a clam would be happy, so that will have to do.
No, I’m talking about you, of course, to you folks out there who are ready for a change.

You see, I’ve decided to tell you how to change your life: dramatically, completely, and irreversibly.  Sure, …

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Once in a while, someone will come into my apartment / office who I immediately know is going to be interesting.  I mean, someone who just really catches my attention for some undefinable reason.  I had a new client this week who I’ll call Jared Leto.  Hmm… I guess maybe I shouldn’t give him the name of a celebrity, so let’s give him a common name like Jor-El Leto.
Jor-El had a lot going for him, and not just his dashing good looks.  ”Dr. Matt, I hear you solve just about …

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Folks, I was talking to Loveleen, a friend of mine, who is a beautiful lesbian.  I don’t mean she’s beautiful for a lesbian.  I mean that she’s beautiful, and she’s also a lesbian. To me, this is like ice cream with both cookie dough and grated dark chocolate on top. Just a wonderful dish.

I was talking to Loveleen about something I’d heard on the radio. Some guy was talking about how he’d realized one day that anything someone does for ten years, they become an expert at. …

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Now, I was having coffee with my friend, famous architect Jonathon Stembridge-Rickenbacker.  Jon was a little upset, because his daughter had spontaneously left a university career behind when she was very close to becoming a pediatrician.
“She wants to be an artist,” said Jon.

I sipped on my delicious latte from Caffe Artigiano, which, if you don’t know, makes the best lattes in all of Vancouver and probably North America.  Well, definitely better than Europe as well, and I’m guessing most of Africa isn’t known for lattes.  Probably trumps Asia and South …

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I heard an amazing thing on the radio the other day. It goes like this: if you piss off a crow, then it will start squawking at you. Other crows will look to see what is going on and will start squawking at you, too. That’s not the amazing thing.

The amazing thing is that crows remember exactly who they were squawking at, and will squawk at the same person the next time they see them. So you can be walking in a different part of town …