Jesus and Myspace

Last week I received this message here on the Myspace Internets:

Hi MySpace neighbor!

I noticed that you’re Christian. To be honest a lot of the mainstream Christian music sounds the same to me, but I found an artist here on MySpace named Mick Joseph whose tunes are truly unique. It turns out that he’s pretty cool so I thought I’d help spread the word. You can visit his MySpace profile by clicking on the banner below. If you like his music, I hope you’ll add him as your friend. I know he really appreciates it. If you’re not interested, please excuse the email.

Peace, Dude

Below this message was a picture of this “Mick Joseph” playing guitar, and a subheading that said “Rock and Roll for the Soul.”

Now, folks, I don’t know about you, but I had a pretty good idea that the person sending the message was, in fact, Mick Joseph. So, let’s take a moment to talk about the character of Mick Joseph. Heck, let’s just address Mick directly.

Sure, Mick, I’m a Christian. Unless, of course, it’s whatever version of Christianity you subscribe to. You see, I don’t remember a part in the Bible that talks about manipulating other people of faith. I do seem to recall parts about integrity and honesty and whatnot.

Yes, you’re right, a lot of mainstream Christian music sounds the same. Could it be related to the fact that mainstream Christianity has become so mired in passionless religiosity that its music is mostly a mindless reflection of that mediocrity?

Now, let’s imagine Jesus playing a guitar. Just think about this for a second, folks. Sure, Jesus might play his own licks, but I don’t exactly remember Jesus living in a cultural vacuum. Didn’t he hang out with the tax collectors and prostitutes and drink wine like it was going out of style? So, put the Messiah on a Fender Strat and I imagine he would play a lot of the songs we already know and love, songs that have already rocked our souls.

Except when he would rock out a tasty riff from Zeppelin or the Who, I think we would say, “Jesus Christ, that music is divine.” Just like he would take the old wine and put it into new wine skins, he would take old Eddie Van Halen and put it into new Christ Almighty skins. Wouldn’t we then likely say that much music beyond “traditional spiritual” tunes can be spiritually powerful?

Just like Christianity is a belief structure reminiscent of the man, Christian music is just music reminiscent of the religion. I think the man himself would rather play something else.

So no, Mick Joseph, I will not add you as my friend.

Dr. Matt*

*Dr. Matt is not a real doctor.

Dr. Matt

Dr. Matt* gives advice on relationships, life, death, half-life, pet ownership, sexuality, asexuality, proto-sexuality, and mustache growing. * Dr. Matt is not a real doctor.

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